Saturday, May 14, 2005

revelations

my first swim this year was good. i forgot how the pool used to be my territory, the place where i wld retreat to do all my thinking. it was the place that i wld vent my anger, to scream at the top of my voice under water to let it all out.

and i forgot how i owned the pool... until today.

this was a place that i found solace. the place where i can let my mind take preceedence over my heart, and i reason the choices i've made so far.

i did some good reflections and thinking in the pool today while doing my laps. i realised how blessed i am... i'm just so thankful for each and every blessing i've had this year, and in my life in general. it's funny how we always gripple abt how unfortunated or xuay we are cos we never win big things, but we often miss out on the small things that we have.

and i realised something, i don't miss him because i still love. i miss companionship. i just simply miss having someone there.

and it struck me that i didn't even think abt him this whole week. i was just so busy with my own life and work, that i never had a chance to think of him fondly. and then i realised what an idle mind can imagine or fantasize. idle minds and hands are just not good.

so yes, as i embark on a new phase in my life, i can't let the things that happen in the past hinder my progress forward. i must cut off watever bondage i have with the past, and move on forward bravely with my head held high.

i'm ready for any challenge. mentally, physically, emotional.

bring it on.

tania @ 10:50 PM | |