incoherent ramblings
i'm done with 10% of my internship, that's 90% closer to the end of it, to my commencement, and to being an unemployed statistic once again.
oh well.
it's not that i've not been actively looking for a job... i've been applying since who-knows-when. it's just that i only want certain jobs, and even though i can't get there directly, i'm taking steps to moving in that correct direction.
hence my internship with risk. i think it's a great department where i can learn more abt the risk factor in trading. i've not yet had the opportunity to analyse the VaR, delta, gamma, beta movements yet, but i will soon. still familiarising myself with all the computer processes. yes, come monday, i'll be generating reports all by myself and sending them out to the analyst, and then the front office.
traders wld be reading my report. how scary. oh, the responsibility.
besides working, my social life is taking a beating. yes, i've gotten to know the 45 other interns, not so well, but at least by face. it's crazy how loopsided the distribution of interns are, 11 guys to 34 girls... guess they want to have some eye candy around the building.
the people that i work with are really really nice people, and i think that they are honestly sincere bunch, as in they are not just nice to me cos i'm in intern, but they seem really nice to everyone. coming from a team of only 15 in singapore and 200 globally, it's too small a team for any petty politics. i guess the team works pretty well.
on a lighter note, i had lunch with my boss on fri, and he said that the team was expanding. that's good news for me i guess, but i'm wondering whether this is something that i want to do for the rest of my life. can risk management be my career?!
that's something to think abt over the next 9 weeks i guess. it's not that the work is not interesting or boring, but i think i'm just not analytical enough to do these work. sigh. am i not good enough?
i don't think i'm cut out to do something analytical. i want to do something creative, something fun like marketing or PR... but that's not where the money is. i won't be able to drive around in fancy cars and carry gucci handbags and sipping coffee at mariott lobby.
either that or i can revert to plan B: marry rich. anyone knows any rich man or potentially rich man, or a potentially dying rich man, pls pass me his contact, or pass him my contact. thanks.
my gym life is also bleeding. i don't think i have the time to go to the gym for my combatt classes cos the timing is just so off. i'm not going for a 9pm class when i want to sleep at 1030pm right. gosh, i sleep even early at work than at school. guess it's more acceptable to sleep during a lecture than sleep during work right?
so i'll be going swimming later. going to the club... hopefully things will be ok with the pool at the club. haven't swam this whole year man. want to feel the water (i wanted to say between my legs, but thought that was sick) as i glide through it. swimming is great man.
ok. after a long rambling post, i think it's time to stop... i think i'll only have the time to update once a week. i'm totally shagged out the minute i reach home from work.
wonder how ya'all doing? drop me a line yea