Saturday, March 13, 2004
i'm so full.
parent's anniversary so went out and eat dinner. ouch... the whole week dieting and then blew it off today. best. it started raining after church and standing by the side of the road waiting for pop to pick me up. i looked all around me and i cld see the rain, i cld hear the thunder... but somehow or other, i didn't feel the rain. weird. i looked around and i saw people running across the road, carrying umbrella... hum... why wasn't i wet? i looked up and saw that i was standing under a huge tree. hum... i quickly ran across the road and stood in the open. crazy? haha... bien non, cos
1. there was lightning
2. i was standing under a tree
3. s'pore has the highest statical deaths by lightning
i didn't want to take my chance. gosh, wat a horrible way to die man. recently there was this prc that was struck by lightning. poor fellow. though i'm not the biggest chi-na fan, but still... it's not exactly an honourable death.
i wonder how i wld die. i hope i won't drown... can see the headlines, " njc swim captain drowns off shallow waters in sentosa" wah. PAISEH. swimming all my life and wat a way to die. can imagine the body lying in the coffin all bloated and blue and all man. eyeRR...
but jumping off a building the body can still be intact. the mourge can do wonders on plastic surgery man. mick looked perfectly perfect when i saw him during the funeral. poor fellow. i guess that's a taboo topic that no one in the family ever talks about. crap. remembered the family crying and crying and crying all over again. i was just standing there wishing the ren was standing there with me. as quiet as he seems, he'll always have something comforting to say. sigh. can't wait till he's back. 20th june. woohoo. can imagine mum and pop waiting eargerly at the airport gates. but damn it lar, once him comes back... there goes my car. i'll drop from 3rd piority to 4th. damn it.
been noticing vios lately... saw a few on the road today... was sitting in the bus and was looking in on one at the traffic light. it's nice eh... i like the fact that the dials are all skewed to one side... makes it looks like those race cars lei... haha... but then i noticed that the electra's dials are also to one side. hum...maybe it's just toyata cars. sat it one on erm... wed. nice. very comfy, aircon's pretty powerful though! haha... or maybe it was just that it was raining the whole day. carried my golf humongous umbrella and i still got wet! damn it. #%$^^#. maybe i'm just too big. haha. GRR.
don't think there's anyway i can psycho my parents to get me a car. damn it. i envy my friends that have their own cars, some have more doors than others. but that's besides the pt. i suppose if i bug my parents hard and long enough i'll be ABLE to get a car. but still. i don't feel good asking them for a car, or money, crap, for anything! i give tuition cos i don't think i shld ask them for money, i try and make do with watever pocket money they give me. but that ain't alot. pop still lives in the era when mee pok noodles are 50cents. damn. mum complains i'm high maintance. i'm not!! i used to, i admit, but i'm much better now. haha. ok, i'm improving! i still wished that my future job scope wld include a ahmad driver, majong, medi and pedicures, big permed hair and canto pop kara ok. hahhahahah... nah. i'm a career woman. those that wld be in power suits and be labelled ice bitches. woohoo. i'm ready to kill. woohoo.
anyway, i think i've digressed.
getting back to my parents. i look at them and i wonder how did they stay (happily?) married for 23 yrs. i know i've seen moments when my parents r/ship have been rocky, or when divorce was even on the rocks. but still, they stuck through. for us? for themselves? i dunno... but i do hope that when i get married, i do hope that it'll only be once. i honestly do believe in a fairy tale wedding and marriage. i know that ONE day, my prince charming will come and sweep me off my feet. hahaha. i believe so at least.
but how can i, when i've NEVER been in a long r/ship. hey, i'm not the one that has problems committing. sure, i've learnt alot of things along the way, with lg, jt, rt, kc... i guess u can minus lg and jt lar. but with rt i learnt to let go. and with kc i learnt to commit. but i guess the things i learnt either came too late or with the whole one.
wtf. addy just told me that shiyi's at kc's place at a party. hum. how small is this world man. damn it. a part of me still hates him, but the other part just can't be bothered. i mean... what he did to me. DAMN it. he shld have felt my wrath like rt did, but no... i just let him go gracefully into another arms. bitch. haizZZ, forget abt the tinis and tanis. i give up.
ry still hasn't sms me back. damn it. angry liao. eat my cheesecake and ran. ASS.
ok, think i better start getting back to editing my group report. want to make it all nice nice considering i didn't make it S/U. ok, must get A+...
damn i'm a perfectionist. damn it.
