Saturday, December 25, 2004
it is christmas eve... everyone is out bustling and doing last minute shopping... walking along the shopping street (notice the singular term) of glasgow, i see friends hurrying about with their massive bags of shopping, families huddling together, carollers singing along the roadside... plus, it did looked like it snowed today. just semi-snowed...
does it feel like christmas?
it doesn't... i walk past the throngs of people, i go to all the carnivals, i see the christmas decorations and i hear the carols playing... it doesn't mean anything to me...
why?
cos i'm not home... i'm not at home, planning wat to wear on christmas day, wat pressents to buy my friends, wat parties to attend, or attending mid night mass... i'm not home.
i miss my friends and family back home... i know i've only been away for slightly over 2 weeks now, but it's more during the festive season that u wished u were home... perhaps things might have been better if i was actually visiting my bf rather than my brother... holidays are the time when u reflect on life and think where's the other half...
last christmas was the first christmas i spent alone, so i guess i'm not really into the feeling sad for myself this year... also with the bussle of being away and jet setting from country to country... it has really kept my mind of things... though i will admit that my mind might have tended towards kc, jeff or bern... but all in all, this feels more like a holiday, rather than the holiday season.
i'm ok lar... just that it doesn't feel like it's christmas...
the prelude to christmas wld always be my birthday... i'll celebrate my birthday and then 2 weeks later, it's christmas... but since i didn't celebrate my birthday this year, and it just passed without me giving an extra thought to it... christmas will pass as well...
so what if it's christmas?
i want to be at home with my family and friends exchanging pressents, cursing and swearing at how hot the weather is, rushing to get last minute pressents (as always), queeing up for taxis to drag ALL my shopping home... yea, something like that...
i miss home.
